As I sat in a packed pub last week, having a pint, minding my own business. I felt someone touch me from behind, at first I thought it was someone brushing past going to the bar, but then I felt a soft hand slide up my back, it came round my shoulder and felt for my buttons. I thought " This should be good" Then the ot ... her hand came round my waist, soft as silk, my buttons were undone, slowly, one by one. I never looked round but could smell expensive perfume, and the soft touch said it all. As the last button was undone I turned to face this mysterous person.................It was Enda Kenny trying to take the shirt off my back......